Thomas Egans: A Man of Valor
Meet Vietnam War veteran Thomas Ray Egans, 72, who served in Alpha Company, 1st Battalion, 9th Marines, 3rd Marine Division from 1960-70. Did I mention that he earned not one, but two Purple Hearts? Here’s how the conversation went on the sidewalk outside Bliss Lounge on The Strand:
Humans of Galveston: You mentioned earlier that you were in some serious firefights and was the last one to survive. Are you okay with talking about that?
Thomas: Yes. I’ve got to do it sooner or later. It’s something that I experienced. And I want to send a shoutout to all of those that I left behind. And I’m going to go to the Vietnam War Memorial Wall (in Washington, D.C.) and visit each and every one of them. I served in a company that suffered 66.6 percent casualties. Out of my squad, I’m the only survivor. And my fervent dream is to visit each and every one of them before I close my eyes.
Humans of Galveston: What can you tell us about your battalion?
Thomas: The 1/9 (1st Battalion, 9th Marines) sustained the highest casualty rate in Marine Corps history. These were the original “Walking Dead.”
Humans of Galveston: Why “Walking Dead?”
Thomas: “The Walking Dead” (name) was given to us by Ho Chi Minh (Chairman of the Worker’s Party of Vietnam). Because we were so effective, he sent a shoutout – the new title – and he assigned units to follow us all over Vietnam.
Humans of Galveston: What was your rank?
Thomas: My rank was corporal. I made corporal in one year, nine months and 11 days. Unheard of. And I got two purple hearts. I wasn’t too bright; I kept going back. (laughs)
Humans of Galveston: How many times did you go back?
Thomas: Totally, us as unit, I went back three times. They pulled us out, sent us to Okinawa, put us back on a ship and sent us back to Vietnam.
Humans of Galveston: How did you get hurt?
Thomas: I was walking point (leading soldier) on a patrol, and I was shot in my wrist, my elbow and my side; and the man behind me was shot. Three days later, my whole squad was wiped out. And I’m the only one left.
Humans of Galveston: Wow. Is there survivor’s guilt?
Thomas: By the ton. There’s times, man, when you sit and all you can think of was why me? What did I do? I don’t deserve this. There were people who had girlfriends that I didn’t have. Wives that I didn’t have. Talent that I didn’t have. Potential, children, all of these things.
Humans of Galveston: And here you are. You’re here.
Thomas: And I continually tell myself that it should have been me.
Humans of Galveston: You listen to the news and you hear the term, post-traumatic stress disorder. Do you have it, and how do you deal with it?
Thomas: I deal with it because the very thing that saved me was children. I wanted to be a father. I wanted to have children. It was the idea of nieces and nephews that I already had who I desperately wanted to get back to and see and watch them grow. And that was my motivation, my driving force – to be a father. I didn’t want to be a doctor, lawyer, Indian chief, engineer, none of that. I just wanted to simply be a dad.
Humans of Galveston: Were you able to make that happen?
Thomas: I’ve got a daughter, Deshawn, who is the oldest. I have five sons – the oldest is Dwayne Anthony, 50; and Gerone, because I wanted him to be named for a true American warrior (Geronimo); Thomas Monroe Egans, who is named after my father; and Christian, 25, a go-getter; and there’s Leandre Laish, who was the son of another friend of mine who was accidently murdered. He was standing on the street corner, going to bowl. Some gang members thought he was in another gang. And they killed a 16-year-old, a very talented basketball player. I couldn’t do nothing to honor him (friend) more than to incorporate his name with my sons. My mother’s name was Lee and my dad’s name was Thomas Monroe Egans. I named my son Thomas Monroe. And I have a grandson named Thomas Monroe.
Humans of Galveston: So that dream of getting out of the jungle and coming home and having kids was realized.
Thomas: That was the high point of my life.
Humans of Galveston: That must have kicked post-traumatic stress disorder in the ass?
Thomas: No. One of them graduated and left, and all of a sudden, I had three sons grown and gone out on their own. That left me with too much time. And right about that time, they (U.S.) was going into Desert Storm in ’91. My knowledge of combat and war kind of flipped on me, and all of sudden I started remembering stuff that I thought I had forgotten, and it became overwhelming. See what I’m saying? I slept with my shotgun by my side. Listen, I was introduced to a man when I first got back from Vietnam in January 1970. He was this very clean dressed, starched Levi’s, spit-shined shoes, dressed immaculate – except he wore a bandana and spoke through a voice machine. He told me that he was a Korean veteran and he asked me, “Did you see combat?” I told him yes. Then he asked, “Did you lose any friends?” I told him yes. He asked me, “Did you kill anybody?” And I told him yes – nine, maybe 13 people. And he told me point-blank, “It ain’t over.” Then he told me, “Don’t do what I did.” And I was wondering what he was talking about, and he pulled his mask down. He had put a shotgun under his chin and pulled the trigger. And he blew off his face from the bridge of his nose to his chin. That’s why he wore the mask. He said, “Whatever you do, don’t do what I did because it’s going to get bad. Because you might not succeed. Look at me. See, I can’t even have a woman. They can’t stand to look at me.” And when I got at my worst, and I was contemplating suicide, I thought about him. That’s my hero. That man is my hero. But not for him, I might have done it. Now, I can’t get along with a woman. (laughs).
Humans of Galveston: You are a phenomenal vocalist. Tell me about the music thing, man.
Thomas: I went to college at California State University in LA and I studied drama. When I came to Texas in ’84, you know there was no outlets. But I messed around and hung out with some friends of mine that could play music, and they said, “C’mon man, sing man.” I said, I sing solo. He said, “Yeah you sing so low I can’t hear you. (laughs) I want you to get up here and sing this song. It was ‘I love music, any kind of music” by the O ’Jays. I felt something that just made me feel good. I had a lot of friends who played music and they always said, come on out Thomas, and that’s my therapy. When I get out there and I sing, they don’t have to pay me. The VA pays me. I retired from the U.S. Post Office after 16 years, I have Social Security benefits.
Humans of Galveston: To the casual observer, you are so polished, cool and they have no idea what you’ve been through. Which is, never judge another person’s walk, because you don’t know where they’ve been.
Thomas: You don’t. You don’t. When I got out of the Marine Corps, I said thread softly, because you’re not the baddest man in the world. There’s somebody on every block, in every neighborhood, in every city, that can kick your ass. See what I’m saying?
Humans of Galveston: It don’t matter how bad you are.
Thomas: It don’t matter. That was just the way I was raised. All I do is try to carry myself in such a way that they (parents) would be proud. And when I go out in this world, I try to look at it with the eyes of 34 different people that didn’t make it, that I knew personally. I probably know 50-60 different people on what wall in Washington. So, I have to try to live a life that they would say, “Hey Thomas, you’re alright.” That’s alright.
Humans of Galveston: Back to music, who would be in your dream band?
Thomas: “My ideal band would be Willie Nelson, because how can you not? This is Willie! I’m On the Road Again. I’d like to get on the road with willie. And Tommy Chong, who played rhythm guitar, because he is funky. From comedy to music, and to be proficient at all of it? And Snoop Dogg, because of him and Willie. You know, it’s an herb thang. And ‘Still Bill’ Clinton on saxophone. And when we get done, we’re going up on the roof for a smoke. I wrote a song that I’d like to do with him, and it’s simply called, “Come Back Home.”
Humans of Galveston: How does it go?
Thomas: (Sings) “We got sailors, we got Marines, soldiers all over the world in places where they really don’t want to be, and we don’t really want them to be there.” So I would just say, “Come back home, come back home where you belong. You’ve been gone too long. It ain’t the same without you here. We keep your picture and a candle burning here to let you know that we love you. And we just wanted you to hear, soldier come back home.”
Published by Bobby Stanton
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